A closer look at the pornography of existence

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Wasting Time in Style

It's on shitty mornings like this that you realise what a waste your life is when it revolves around partying. How empty this whole "lifestyle" really is. I wouldn't go as far as pretending that the people I meet while clubbing aren't "real" friends, but let's just say that drinking and dancing isn't very productive when it comes to shaping tomorrow's world.



It can remain healthy when you go out once in a while, greeting faces you haven't seen in a while, toasting to their latest realisations. But when you see them more often than you see your own mother, it can become tiring. You start asking questions to yourself. Do you really love to dance that much ? Do you really dance at all ? Personally, I mainly just talk to people I "know", catch up, make plans for future parties, networking. As if I was too busy planning the future to enjoy the present. It's a turning wheel; will I ever be able to enjoy the moment ?

Some sleep has to be gained. Some reflections have to mature.

I wouldn't want to take a decision based on a bad hung over day, but my mood is really affected right now. It seems I am often doing lots of things I don't feel like doing, forcing myself, and it's not in my nature to do so.

I always took my time, all my life, to do things properly, and now that I'm constantly rushed because I take up too many responsabilities, I find out that time is way more valuable than money. And time is what I have lost. Do it proper or don't do it, but don't do too much.